Nothing Exchange

Congratulations! You've stopped looking at kittens and lesbians on the internet for long enough to find us. We realise that you may have stumbled here by accident whilst searching for more, but now that you're here why not take a look around?

Here at Nothing Exchange we are devoted to selling Nothing since we’ve, shamefully, run out of kittens and lesbians to post images of. Sounds a bit weird, but the Internet is a very big, very weird place, and we’re not the only ones doing it. If you have a bit of a look around you’ll find plenty of other people selling nothing or even nothing at all. So what makes us different?

Well, we’ve taken the idea a few steps further. See, we’ve created a little artificial market where we will put the all-powerful law of supply and demand to the test. We have a limited supply of Nothing available for sale and once the whole stock is sold, Nothing Exchange will turn into something akin to an open market where anyone who owns units of Nothing will be able to offer them for sale at any price they deem fair, and anyone who wishes to buy them will be free to do so. So instead of just giving you the opportunity to have a bit of a laugh and be able to say that you’ve literally bought Nothing today, we also give you the hope that one day you will be able to say: “I’ve sold Nothing today. At a profit.” For more details check out the Nothing Exchange page.

Also there's I'd Rather Buy Nothing, where you can buy Nothing instead of products which do horrible, nasty things to kittens, lesbians, and the world in general.

If you’re not interested in shopping on this particular day, but still like sites with absolutely no kittens and no lesbians (we have nothing against either kittens or lesbians, we simply don't want to enslave them to the will of the internet any further), browse around and enjoy. Check below for a selection of the latest content on the site and, below that, links to the main sections of the site.

Warning: A lot of the content you may come across will be random. Having at least a basic sense of humour is required if you are going to enjoy the content to any degree.

 
Nothing Exchange continues its steady march towards the one million mark. We're already 0.0628% of the way there! Buy a unit of Nothing today, because tomorrow we may be all sold out**.
**Perhaps not tomorrow, as in actual tomorrow, as in "the day after today". But if you look at tomorrow in a more poetic sense, as in "an undefined point in the future", we're pretty sure we will be all sold out and you will be sorry for not buying. 
NothingSoldChartMini.png
By: Maya on Jan 16, 2013
Billions of dollars made from selling diamonds have been used to fund wars. Slave labor is still used to mine them.
The price of diamonds is artificially inflated by keeping them in vaults and...

[More]
Jan 28, 2014
Posted by: Jerk
I think I've figured out where we went wrong.
Coin. It's just a word. Do you know how I know it's a word? Because it's in the dictionary. It's been a while. To be honest, we...
Jan 18, 2013

To: Apple Inc.
Subject: The Perfect Product

Dear Apple,

I write to you with a suggestion for a new product.

It is sleek, it is simple, it is beautiful. It is like nothing you have ever seen. In fact it is just that – Nothing..

[More]
Feb 1, 2013
Posted by: Meek
The first person who, having enclosed a plot of land, took it into his head to say this is mine and found people simple enough to believe him was the true founder of civil society. What crimes, wars, murders, what miseries and horrors would the human race have been spared, had some one pulled...
[More]

 

Have some questions?  Feel free to  Contact Us, or head over to the Forum to say hi.


Jan 28, 2014
Posted by: Jerk
I think I've figured out where we went wrong.

Oct 23, 2013
Posted by: Minx
Read about George Osborne's amazing plans to help the poor feel worthy and useful once again.

May 10, 2013
Posted by: Jerk
Unfortunately, the answer to that is probably "Business as usual".

Apr 11, 2013
Posted by: Minx
From the depths of the Internet a new danger arises. But never fear - Nothing Exchange is here.

Apr 4, 2013
Posted by: Jerk
You have disappointed us, internet.

 
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